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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27310411">Butterflies' graveyard</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/haoshoumon/pseuds/haoshoumon'>haoshoumon</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>SEVENTEEN (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Songfic, War, but only for Hao</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 20:27:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,069</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27310411</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/haoshoumon/pseuds/haoshoumon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Xu Minghao was just a moment, as ephemeral as the butterflies that seemed to want to claim his body for themselves.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kim Mingyu/Xu Ming Hao | The8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Butterflies' graveyard</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I wanted something spooky and then came out with this. Ok i guess</p>
<p>I was listening to one day the butterflies left will be in your chest as you march towards your death by BMTH and the aftermath by escape the fate while writing this!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Xu Minghao was just a moment, as ephemeral as the butterflies that seemed to want to claim his body for themselves.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The war had taken everything from him. His friends. His honor. His soul. So he really didn't care if those damned insects took him, in the end, because Mingyu wasn't there to receive him after all.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Minghao had really believed that if he knocked down his enemies one by one, if he raised his fists to fight, he would be worthy to return home. However, </span>
  <em>
    <span>who</span>
  </em>
  <span> were the enemies? Why did he have to be responsible for leading them to the path of death? Why did he have to be the one who wielded a sword and stuck it in the chest of enemies who were not his?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He was alone.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Minghao had felt when the thread that connected him to Mingyu broke, he felt so deeply that he wished he had died with him. What was the sense of returning home if his home no longer existed?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The horrors of war flashed behind his eyelids whenever he closed his eyes, whenever he tried to ignore the emptiness that seemed to grow more and more inside his chest. Maybe Minghao deserved that, though. Maybe Mingyu was the price of all his sins. He had been foolish to believe that there were a right and a wrong side to the war, foolish to believe that there were honor and righteousness in his actions.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Minghao had killed people.</span>
  </em>
  <span> So many people he couldn't even count, so many people who certainly deserved to live much more than him. And he was pathetic for feeling so sorry for himself as if he were the one who would cry a father, a brother, a lover murdered far from home. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He</span>
  </em>
  <span> had done it with himself.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The trenches full of mud around him were a constant reminder of all that horror as if Minghao was at least able to forget for some moment.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He just didn't know what to do.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>All that had motivated him through the war was the hope to return to Mingyu, but even if he was alive, he wouldn't dare to maculate him with his bloody hands. Mingyu deserved more than that, he deserved more than a murderer in his bed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Honestly, he had no more strength to fight against whatever was that force that pulled him further and further down and crushed his ribs. Butterflies were still around him, but closer than before.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They continued there even when it started raining, which was undeniably strange. He couldn't breathe, not with Mingyu's face dancing in his mind as he let himself slip into the filth under his feet.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Perhaps there was something wrong with butterflies. Maybe there was something wrong with him. Minghao would never know for sure.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Maybe all the grief and hatred and disgust was making him delirious, but he could swear that the blue wings of one of them were totally dry, and he was even more sure of that when it touched his forehead, his nose, and his chest.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>By the heavens, he was exhausted.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He was exhausted from wandering aimlessly, exhausted by knowing that, no matter what he did, he would be alone with the ghost of his acts. He closed his eyes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That time, his brain conjured one of his last memories of Mingyu, of when they were together in the attic stealing hidden moments. Mingyu had promised to marry him, even if nobody could ever know about them both. Minghao wondered how he would have died, if the flu had taken him or if someone had killed him, just like Minghao had killed someone's love.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The butterfly landed on Minghao's eyes, and then he</span>
  <em>
    <span> saw.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I don't like it when you get all gloomy like that," the ghostly image of Kim Mingyu smiled at him and extended his hand to Minghao's dirty cheek.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"And I don't like it when you die," Minghao grumbled back, being absolutely sure he was having a fever delirium.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"That's not my fault," Mingyu laughed, God why the hell was he </span>
  <em>
    <span>laughing?</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and came closer, nesting Minghao's head in his lap. "But you can rest now, you're home."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>God, Minghao wanted to cling to that delirium, he didn't want Mingyu to escape through his fingers once again. He didn't want to be left to die alone and cold and afraid. He didn't want to blink and run the risk of Mingyu disappearing when he opened his eyes again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I love you, ladybug," Mingyu whispered what he always wrote at the end of his letters to make sure they wouldn't get caught. Minghao wanted to hate him for reminding him of something else that would only serve to end him even more, but his determination disappeared when he felt Mingyu's lips on his own and, by God, why did that seem so real?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He could almost smell the coffee Mingyu's hands always had, he could almost feel the caress on his cheek that Mingyu always did with his thumb.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I want to go home, Mingyu," Minghao sighed, barely able to see. He didn't even know if it was his fault for the tears or the rain or anything else.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"We're going, ladybug," Mingyu whispered and covered Minghao's eyes. "Close your eyes."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Minghao obeyed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Mingyu's lips descended on his again and on his chest and Minghao felt his breath slow down and stabilize and slow down again. His head was too light and everything seemed too ethereal and he could not keep his eyes closed for much longer.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>However, when he opened them, they were no longer in the remains of that war camp.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They were at home, Mingyu had taken him home, and smiled at him, and Minghao knew he was free. Finally free, even if he didn't deserve it, even if he knew he should pay for his sins and that probably not even hell would have room for someone like him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But he was free because Mingyu loved him and had set him free because he knew that Minghao wouldn't be able to breathe alone with all that guilt. Mingyu had set him free because he didn't want to be alone and because he knew that the two of them deserved more than they had been able to have him until then.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And if they couldn't have it in life, then they would become the masters of Death.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>my twt is haoshoumon if you wanna chat</p></blockquote></div></div>
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